Let me start by saying thank you for all of your prayers.
Now, Since my boyfriend died, I have been on a break because I truly needed to regroup and process the loss. I've been through a lot this year but loosing him has by far been my greatest challenge and mountain. Sometimes you get to a point where you feel so empty that you have no more to give and in those moments, you may have to be selfish and take some healing time so that God can pour into you, so that you may pour into other. I want to thank you all for respecting my 'pour time.' At the time of my last post, I knew that I just needed to sit back. I don't want y'all to think that I was sitting in corner crying, or cooped up depressed because I wasn't. And although tears have been shed, I know that I'll be okay.
Just to paint the picture; I met him about 5-6 years ago during my clubbing days and when he approached me, I was like "OMG this man is everything." (Don't judge me lol) But he was so handsome, funny, and so smooth and his smile.....Lord his smile! It was the closest thing to love at first sight, but I am sure back then it was just lust. As I digress, we started dating and I started falling but, eventually we parted because of life and growth, we went our separate ways. Only for us to reconnect 5 years later with the same chemistry but on a better, deeper, more sensual level.
With all of the things that I went through last year especially with my divorce, I really didn't think that love and a fairy tale type connection would happen for me. But it did and it just felt right and it felt like I had finally connected to the man that I genuinely wanted to and could spend the rest of my life with. Then one day it changed and to have literally talked to him the day before amazed me because he was here one moment and gone the next. I've never in my life met a man who was so interested and so supportive of my dreams. NEVER . For him to sit and read my blog because he had a sincere interest in it and to want to see all of the custom orders that I made for people, is only a small way that he let me know that he loved me. He was a dream and I'm blessed that I had the chance to call him my "Babe. "
I believe that this too shall pass and I have to continue to pray and stay focused through all of the hurt, because even in my hurt, there is purpose.